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13 Responses to How I Found Elimination and Communication in EC

  1. Melissa K.  

    I love hearing how families have made EC work for their specific situation and their individual children. So many people think that it has to be all or nothing, but as you show here, it can be done in a variety of ways depending on the needs of the child. Thanks for sharing this wisdom from your journey!

    • Zoie @ TouchstoneZ  

      Thank you, Melissa. That has been the real lesson for me on this journey. Every time I would get stressed about not “catching,” I would try to remember that it really is in the hands of the child-not on me (kinda like this whole parenting gig)

  2. Shannon R  

    This was a really interesting read, I wish I had known about EC when Patrick was born. He always got upset when he messed in his diaper. I probably could have avoided a lot of discomfort for him then and now if I had paid more attention to the cues he was giving me. With future children I am going to give EC more thought because it is stories like yours and Melissa’s that make me want to try this with our children. My only worry is about daycare and EC but hopefully the communication at home would make up for the few hours they would spend in cloth at a daycare facility. Thank you so much for sharing your three very different experiences with EC.

    • Zoie @ TouchstoneZ  

      Thank you, Shannon. I’ve been thinking about writing on our experiences with childcare and ec. They have had some great experiences and some not so great. It may take a bit of extra time at first to get them open to the idea that a very young child will communicate about their pottying needs. Most people just don’t believe it because they’ve rarely seen it.

      I agree with you that even if you can’t get a care provider on board with it, I don’t think it will have a huge impact with all the positive parenting and connection time they have with their family at home

  3. Janine  

    Great post! I think that cloth diapers make a really big difference in babies recognizing that they are wet. It’s great to hear from someone who successfully EC-ed to potty training. 🙂 I’d love a post on tips to transition from EC to Baby getting himself onto the potty.

  4. Adrienne

    Just starting our EC journey…my so is 8 months and we started it at 7 months. I’ve only done diaper-free like one day and realized he’s too squirmy/wiggly to stay on the prefold and/or blanket I had laid underneath him. Any tips for bare-booty time? Since our journey began, he now waits for me to take him the toilet for poop, and he’ll pee when I take him after naps and when he wakes up in the morning, but other than that, I still miss any signals for pee. I need help understanding naked time– is it so I can see what he does before he goes? Or to see how often he goes? Or to see if he’ll wait until I take him to the potty to go (that one day I tried it, he just went on the floor) ? I’m confused about the purpose of the diaper-free time, though I read about it on EC blog posts frequently. Please help! 🙂

    • Zoie @ TouchstoneZ  

      Thank you for your comment, Adrienne. Congratulations on starting your EC journey! There’s a lot in your comment. So I’ll speak to it a bit and include some links for further reading that I think might help. First of all, it sounds like you are already following his cues beautifully in so many areas. Kudos for that! Secondly, don’t stress about missing signals-or about anything with EC for that matter. Remembering that the goal is: for parent and baby to trust one another while supporting him to maintain his connection to his body. It’s not the number of catches.

      Signals change a lot. Trusting that he is communicating with you, even when you can’t spot it, helps. It may take awhile. There are going to be misses. Sometimes that will be all there are. Sometimes be a few catches. So, letting go of expectations on the catch-miss ratio while acknowledging when connection *is* made with each other helps(also keeping a good floor cleaner and stack of prefolds handy at all times.)

      In answer to your naked time questions: Yes, it could be any of those things. I find that on days that I can attune to baby’s needs, we do naked time. When I can’t focus on him, I’ll use a diaper if it’s causing stress or I’ll do the best I can and plan to clean up a lot. Also, naked time for boys is great because even when communication clues are a work in progress, there are physical cues such as ballooning. I’m not sure how graphic I can be here and this comment is really long, so I’ll leave it at the term and direct you to the links in the post above and here below

      diaperfreebaby.org can link you to local groups. There’s nothing like in person support for ec confidence.

      On NPN:
      Intro to EC (parts 1 & 2): http://naturalparentsnetwork.com/intro-to-ec-part-1/

      On TribalBaby.org:
      Naked Time: http://tribalbaby.org/ECbecomingnappyfree.html

      Spotting Signals:

      Timing Cues & Signals (especially the tickle spot at the bottom of the page)

      I hope this is helpful. Feel free to contact me directly. I’m happy to answer further questions anytime. Namaste

  5. Adrienne

    correction on my type: “my so” is supposed to be “my son”…it’s not some new acronym. 🙂

  6. Amy R.

    Lovely post, Zoie. It’s so interesting to hear about your EC journey with your kids. I particularly like how laid back you’re feeling about it at this point. Thanks for writing this!

  7. Rosemary  

    Love how you met each child right where he was at and modified your practices while staying consistent to your convictions. Such an array of paths to choose from! Thank you for inspiring us. 🙂

  8. Zoie @ TouchstoneZ  

    Thank you, Rosemary. I appreciate the observation. That’s both a beauty and a challenge of ec. It can be overwhelming until you find your groove. One of our strengths as parents is trusting in our little ones. Believing in that trust, even when we might not know for sure, really helps.