E-Mail 'Hug It Out' To A Friend Email a copy of 'Hug It Out' to a friend * Required Field Your Name: * Your E-Mail: * Your Remark: Friend's Name: * Separate multiple entries with a comma. Maximum 5 entries. Friend's E-Mail: * Separate multiple entries with a comma. Maximum 5 entries. Image Verification: * Loading ... 8 Responses to Hug It Out Kathy Haynie December 3, 2010 at 11:19 pm Your post made me laugh, and brought back memories of my own babies, the youngest of whom is now 24. I DO miss those days of constant attachment and sweet snuggles! I was lucky to be a full-time at-home mama with my 5 children. When I had less time to hold the younger babies, I noticed that the older siblings helped take up the slack. Plenty of love to go around. The babies lived in my Snugli when they were small. Thank you for a thoughtful post. My daughter-in-law sent me to your blog. Heather December 4, 2010 at 10:32 pm Very wonderful post! My daughter is 3 months old, and I am a self proclaimed attachment parent. A lot of people I know think I’m “spoiling” my daughter by co-sleeping, exclusively breastfeeding on demand (even at night), and literally having my baby girl attached 24/7. I don’t care what others think though personally, I completely agree with what you said in your post. I think I’m doing the best I can, and it works for our family. These baby days go too fast and having 2 other children (8 and 1) as well, the early morning breastfeeding and co-sleeping are my baby and I’s special time together. I know she won’t remember these times, but I hope that I am helping to develop a secure little person for in the future. Laura lauramaeve December 5, 2010 at 7:07 am Thank you thank you thank you! We share similar experiences of bring up baby. My little man is 11 months old now and we have co-slept and breastfed since he was born. My mother and various non-breastfeeding friends and relations, take every opportunity to tell me that I am setting myself up for a nightmare when it comes time for him to have his own room. They advocate cying-it-out and tell me that he needs to learn to ‘self-soothe’ or he’ll be to dependent on me!! I am sooo heartened by your article. I was starting to feel like maybe they have a point and I’m being a bad mother. THANK YOU for making me realise that I’m not alone. Heather December 5, 2010 at 1:31 pm I would just like to say to the previous poster – Remember this! WE are doing what has been done for centuries, something that has been passed down from generation to generation, something that is biologically what we are supposed to be doing! In my opinion something that feels so right, and seems to make our children SO happy can’t be wrong and definitely can not make you a bad parent! stefanie December 6, 2010 at 12:52 am Thanks so much for your kind comments, everyone! And to Laura: ditto what Heather said! Since my son was born (also 11 months ago!), I’ve been criticized by strangers who initiated conversation with me for co-sleeping, breastfeeding and babywearing. Crazy! But! I’ve had some really heartening talks with (mostly older) ladies who congratulate me for doing what they secretly did, too. I’ve also gotten support from women whose cultures of origin value the extended family a lot more than we normally do here in the US. One grandmotherly lady who turned out to be from Mexico said to me in a checkout line, “Are you sleeping at night with your little one?” to which I feebly answered yes. She shocked me by squeezing my son’s cheeks and saying, “Good! That must be why he is so happy!” Lauren December 6, 2010 at 10:48 am Lovely post, and sums up a lot of my own experiences, maybe because my baby is 11 months old, too. As I watch her growing up, all to fast, a part of me dreads the day she wishes to sleep alone. Never, never, never will I regret holding her and sleeping with her. I already miss those newborn snuggle-days, and the thing that gets me through is knowing I took every opportunity to connect with my sweet girl. Momma Jorje December 7, 2010 at 10:59 pm Yep, my daughter is “spoiled rotten,” but I am *convinced* that spoiling her now (she is currently 15 months old) will help her to be a confident, independent person. I’m already seeing glimpses of that independence… and remembering the days when all she did was sleep! They do grow so very quickly! Lisa C edenwild December 12, 2010 at 12:30 am This sounds a lot like my little boy’s first 8 months (at around 8 months I was finally able to put him down for his naps…or at least half of his nap). Being so physically close to your baby all the time really cements the bond between you. It’s tiring, but it’s so worth it. At nine months old, my son wouldn’t let me out of his sight for a second. Then when he started to crawl, I taught him that he could follow me, and I never went further than he could follow easily. It made him feel very secure. Slowly, he started spending time on his own, and now at age 2.5 I am able to clean the house, or read, or write (who are we kidding, we can’t do it ALL). I knew not to listen to people who wanted to make us think we were spoiling our child. I knew his emotional health was more important, and that independence would come when he was ready for it. I daresay I was right. I look back over the last 2.5 years, and I’m so happy I got to hold him so much, day and night. I’ll never get that time back with him, and I’m so glad I took full advantage of it.