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14 Responses to Parenting With Self-Empathy

  1. Amy G  

    Thank you for this post! Last night was a really tough night for sleeping, and at times I just wasn’t being the Mama I want to be. But, reading this reminds me it’s ok and understandable. I have to read NVC!!

  2. Sylvia@MaMammalia

    Really beautiful post! We’ve had a run of rough nights, and hence days, so this was a great reminder for me today. Funny, I wrote something along the same lines awhile back, but this post feels like it sunk it deeper. Thank you!
    P.S. I used to live on Guam, too!

  3. kathleen  

    Hi Melissa,

    I really like this post and was wondering if you would be interested in me publishing it in my magazine. It’s just a small magazine (2000 copies locally) and I can’t offer to pay you I’m afraid as I haven’t made any profit yet but what do you think?

  4. Janine  

    YES YES YES. Although I wish that I could find a better in-between rather than either being super mom patient or flying off the handle. I feel like i am usually really empathetic, as I have a tendency to be sensitive to little things myself. Sometimes though, it is just impossible to wrap my head around why not be allowed to touch the dishwasher is meltdown-worthy.

  5. melissa aka equidae

    Its lovely reading this as I was just thinking about this problem in my head. However, how do I get myself to step back BEFORE sending a tirade to my son? I tend to be in a fully blown tantrum myself by the time I realise I shouldn’t have and should have taken some time to think about it. This taking a breath before speaking has me in knots as I cant seem to do it 🙁

    • Melissa  

      It really can be a challenge to stop and think in tough situations. I definitely catch myself a bit too late sometimes as well! I like to think of those as good opportunities to model humility and a good apology – and to be honest about my own feelings.

      “I’m sorry. Let me try start over. I’m feeling extra tired/cranky/etc today, and I answered before I took time to think about it. I’d like to try to again a little more calmly.” Or something along those lines. I think it’s healthy for our kids to see us mess up, and handle it gracefully! <3

  6. Amy Phoenix  

    Thank you, Melissa, this is lovely and congrats on having it published in a local mag. 🙂