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4 Responses to Respecting My Toddler’s “No”

  1. Montessori Motherload

    I do agree that we shouldn’t push kids to show affection (hug, kiss) when they say “no.” Even with family, I always ask my daughter if she’d like to hug/kiss them goodbye and usually she does. However, if she says, “No” I do not force her to. I don’t want her ever to feel obligated to hug/kiss people she doesn’t want to, especially since I’ve read that it is more likely that a person who is taken advantage of in that way is someone you know rather than a stranger.

  2. Montessori Motherload

    Just re-read my comment and hope I don’t sound too paranoid or suspicious of people I know! I just don’t want to build in a feeling of obligation in her, that’s all!

    • Adrienne

      Oh, I didn’t take it that way at all! It’s so important to consider that our modeling and molding of our children has an impact that lasts far into the future! I valued your points greatly.

  3. Mama Mo @ Attached at the Nip

    I also think respecting the no is vitally important. I wrote about it earlier this summer (http://attachedatthenip.blogspot.com/2012/06/when-my-children-say-no-to-me.html). I allow– and even encourage– my children to say no to me for two reasons. First, they get practice at negotiating and being heard. Second, I don’t want blindly compliant children; I want them to know how to stand up to authority figures when they’re older. I figure it’s good practice on me now.

    Thanks for writing about this topic. It’s an important one!