E-Mail 'What Makes the Perfect Parent?' To A Friend Email a copy of 'What Makes the Perfect Parent?' to a friend * Required Field Your Name: * Your E-Mail: * Your Remark: Friend's Name: * Separate multiple entries with a comma. Maximum 5 entries. Friend's E-Mail: * Separate multiple entries with a comma. Maximum 5 entries. Image Verification: * Loading ... 7 Responses to What Makes the Perfect Parent? Dionna codenamemama December 11, 2012 at 7:25 am Oh my – what a perfectly lovely post to read first thing this morning (and this Carnival). I, too, am breaking a cycle, and so I often have my own doubts and fears. But you’re right – we are trying. We are striving to connect and make things better. I know in my heart that my children will be healthier from our efforts to create strong, loving relationships. Lucy@dreamingaloud.net December 11, 2012 at 7:52 am Oh Mrs Green, Mrs Green, what a can of worms this one is for me! You write it so well. With three kids, one of whom is extremely high needs my confidence in my ability, not my desire, to do it differently, often wanes. For me it is a mixed bag. The bits my mum was good at, that I aspire to repeat, I’m not so good at. The bits I swore I would not repeat, I have, though not everything. But I keep trying… Rosemary RosemaryMJones December 11, 2012 at 9:05 am I love this so much. We also parent from a “damage control” response & it’s challenging. I so identify with the dual compassion & rage at the tools that were passed on to me. I’ve come to learn the biggest differences, like you said, are authenticity and for us, apologizing and owning mistakes, seeking forgiveness when I’m in the wrong. It’s challenging to be humble. But seeing the blossoming connection with my girl makes it SO worth it. I love what your daughter has to say about you. Good job, momma. aNonyMous December 11, 2012 at 9:36 am Wow! I could have written this myself. I absolutely agree! Their damage is not an excuse to parent in a damaging way. And the buck does stop with us! I’m absolutely determined not to make the same mistakes with my child that my parents made with me. Fantastic post! Lauren Hobo_Mama December 11, 2012 at 3:04 pm I LOVE this post. I’ve seen the same divide in follow vs. no-follow, and also fall into no-follow. (I wonder if a lot of us blogger types do, which is why we need to write out the differences we’re making?) I think you’ve really hit the nail on the head for me, too, about lack of awareness or intentionality. I get irritated when I see people choosing a lack of choice. As you say, in my compassionate moments, I can see it differently, but I do advocate strongly for choice and awareness. Jennifer @ Hybrid Rasta Mama hybridrastamama December 12, 2012 at 7:23 am Love this post! You bring a very real and honest perspective and I think a lot of parents should read this so that they can see what *is* possible in parenting. I am with Lauren, I get more irritated when I see people choosing not to choose and instead just going with their autopilot default response. I have many friends who do this and it is just painful. Thanks for a great post! Destany December 21, 2012 at 7:10 pm I feel so similarly about my upbringing. I try to do the tactful thing and keep a lid on my emotions, only to find them bubbling to the surface when I’m really not expecting it. When I do express bad feelings towards my parents, simply entertain bad thoughts, I feel a lot of guilt about it. Like a spoilt little brat, and an ingrate. I’m sorry that you have negative memories, but I will say that I feel better about entertaining my negative thoughts. I must allow myself permission to do so. Thank you for the wonderful post!